God's Amazing Love, part 2

Back in September I wrote about God's amazing love. He had shown it to me tangibly many times at the National Youth Workers' convention in Sacramento. Well, He's been showing it to me lately in similar and even bigger ways.

Last night, I went to a Shane & Shane concert in San Jose with Nigel and about ten friends. It was an awesome time, as their performances/worship times always are. And at the very end of the night (get ready for the deja-vu) they started singing "How Great is Our God." And yup, right after it, they sang "It Is Well With My Soul." I thanked God for thinking of me in that way, once again, and reminding me of all He's done in my life (see God's Amazing Love, the original post in September).

But even bigger than that, God has brought me Nigel. He's already heard most of this from me, but I wanted to put it here for you all, my friends, to read as well. I ahve prayed for years for God to bring me a special man, one who I would spend my life with. One who would love me as I am, the good and bad, and care about/for me by living God's love. I had no idea God would bring me more than I asked for.

I'm a pretty simple woman, from a simple upbringing, with simple yet strong and unwavering faith and an "old-fashioned" kind of love to give. But I am also messy, stubborn, picky about certain things, and love a good intellectual debate (though debates aren't necessarily bad).

Nigel has been so constant since I met him. Even though I've had many fears, doubts, and lack of trust due to being hurt and deceived so many times in the past, he has always, from day one, said he will not give up on me and that he loves me, ALL of me, just as I am. He has shown me more grace and love in just over two months than anyone other than God ever has, and he just keeps on going. I keep thinking he's going to all of a sudden "wise up" and run, like men always have in my life. But he doesn't. He just loves me more.

I keep wondering how it is that God could love me enough to send me someone like Nigel. It doesn't make sense at all. I'm far from good, and made so many mistakes, how could I deserve this kind of blessing? Yet God assures me I do deserve it, and much more, because He loves me that much.

I know that we will face challenges, especially once we get married, and I know we will not always see eye to eye (and we don't, even know, all the time). Yet, with God as our focus and guide and the center of all we say and do, the rest of it will work out. I know it will.

My favorite tradition that we have started is going up San Damiano every Wednesday night after I'm done with Wildside to pray together and talk about our relationship. San Damiano is a Benedictine retreat center straight up the mountain from here. They allow people to come there to pray and have quiet time with God. There are no cars, no streets other than the one leading to it, and there is a view of the entire valley. I can see my church, my house, and a lot more from there. It's amazing, and since I moved here has been my favorite place.

I am very excited, and yes a little scared too, for this next season in my life. It's hard for me to entrust my heart to someone besides God. God will never, ever let me down, but people always will at times. Yet I am so very glad to have found someone to share my life with - to walk side by side through the hills valleys, and meadows, and to love. God is so good!